19 July 2013

Crazy European

I recently received the following by way of a cc.


Dear NSA,

A couple of months ago, I held an interesting chat on Skype with a female US citizen by the name of Kasandra, of 23 years of age (at least that's what she told me).  During the chat, we exchanged some information about our mutual likes/dislikes, pictures, and our respective addresses and telephone numbers. The latter because we seemed to quite like eachother, and because I am planning a visit to your beautiful country soon, so we were planning to meet.

Unfortunately, my (Microsoft Windows) PC crashed just a week later, and I lost all my personal contacts, email accounts, logins etc. and her details were in that lot. 

So I am now quite desperate.

But I was told by a friend recently, that your organisation records and stores all Skype conversations as long as they involve at least one non-US citizen, and that you can easily retrieve such information for years to come. I am a European national resident in Germany, so I should easily qualify.

My friend even told me that you had a special storage category for "3rd-grade friends" like Germany, so it should be relatively easy to find, as I was on-line then from somewhere near Stuttgart.

Here are some other clues : what I recall of the conversation, is that it was on April 1st 2013, at night here (so around 21:00 Berlin time), and that the conversation should have included words such as "environment", "concrete", and "Yellowstone".

I also remember that she has a close relationship with a card-paying member of the ACLU (this should help you really focus the search).

So could you please help me at least by retrieving her address and telephone number ?

Thank you in advance

A.W. (name withheld for discretion)

P.S. I know that your laws do not allow you to either confirm or deny the existence of these records, and that you cannot even talk about it.

But that's ok. You can use one of your direct connections to the email servers to drop a discrete message directly in my email box aw007@yahoo.com, with just her phone number for example. 

Just use a somewhat suggestive sender address (like sweetlando.fliberties@mycontrytisofthee.com e.g.), so that I can distinguish it easily from Nigerian spam.


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