13 September 2007

Business Opportunities

Today, I was riding down the street thinking about the time, a couple years ago, when I taught some computer classes for our local public radio station that had unwisely wandered into the internet business. The classes were quite successful, and I taught a lot of good computer stuff to a lot of people, mostly seniors and technophobes.

Today I had to visit the radio station on some other business, so was thinking about those classes on my ride home. And thinking about how it would be kind of an interesting business to provide computer training and minor related services. But it's very difficult to charge enough for such services to actually stay in business. But that's okay because I don't really need the money (Jack pays me well), I'd just be doing it for the hell of it and to provide a community service. So I thought, why not call it "Communist Computer Services?"

Our motto could be, "From me according to my means, to me according to my needs--and they are quite substantial."

Which got me thinking about provocative names.

Which led to Al Queda (or possibly "Jihad") Computer Services: "We fix it fast or we blow ourselves up."

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On hearing of my brilliant ideas, a friend suggested another possible approach to computer training services, this one rather guaranteed to have a steady supply of customers:

Age is not a barrier ! You too can still learn the Internet. 900-555-5555 Alzheimer Computer Institute.

We provide Internet and Computer courses for any age. As a matter of fact, you might have enrolled already, call us to check! 900-555-5555 Alzheimer Computer Institute.

Computer and Internet courses, specially tailored for minorities, less-valid citizens, retired persons etc. With your telephone, dial 900-555-5555 (that's nine, zero, zero, three times five and four times five). Alzheimer Computer Institute.

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And this:

This one is not really in the area of computers or internet training, but as long as we're looking for new business..

Forget about fireworks and boring cake popups,
Celebrate with a flash and a bang!
Certified genuine Islamic martyrs for hire.
Come in various sizes and colors.
Satisfaction guaranteed : any dud will be replaced for free.
Unbeatable prices : most of the reward is paid in the hereafter.
Group discounts available.
Post-event cleanup included.
Call 900-555-5555 AlQaeda Inc. now !

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